In this our fast changing world we now have to deal with different type of people and this people have different habit, temperament, worries and want and in dealing with all these people will have to deal with their differences either at workplace, school, home, church, on the street we have to deal with people in other to make any head in our day to day activities.
If we take a look at our society the truly most successful people are those who have mastered the art of getting along with people they meet and work with and on the other hand the most irritating people who all have ever met are people who have no clue on how to get along with people.
Let us examine some of the things we can do to help us get along with other people no matter how shrew they may want to be. One beautiful thing I want all reader to know is that getting along with people does not cost money or great effort but they are just very simple adjustment that if we are willing to make in our day to day activities will make people attracted to us like iron filings to magnet.
Let us examine some of the following and see how they can help us to get along with other people:
1. Do not criticize.
2. Show Appreciation.
3. Do your best to remember names.
These are just a few of what we can do that will help us to get along with people but before we begin to examine these things let us find things that are common to all human being.
Every man or woman on this planet has something in common which we all want or crave to have and without which life will be unbearable 1. Food 2. Shelter 3. Money and what money can buy 4. Sexual Gratification 5. Feeling of being important or relevant.
All these wants listed above are usually gratified with the exception of the last one, the feeling of being of being important. Any man who can make the people he comes in contacts will surely get along with people. Every man has an insatiable desire to be honored and to be regarded as important. Therefore the secret of getting with others is finding a way to ease this desire to be honored and feel important. It is important to note that in the process of making others feel important we should not go over ourselves by succumbing to all their desire thereby making us there puppet neither should we do this only for the benefits we seek from them but make it an habit such that everyone we meet is left feeling better about himself.
1. Do not criticize.
Many times when someone as done something we do not approve we try to the and more often than not we criticize the person hoping to make them see or comply but what criticism does is to condemn the person to tell them that they are not good enough, it wounds the other persons pride and builds resentment, it puts the person in a defensive state and dampen the emotions of the other person.
Many parent often criticize their children at the slightest opportunity, in fact if we look around us we will find out many people actually gain their feeling of self-worth by criticizing but we also know that people like this are shallow ashamed of asking for help they did rather put everybody around them down.
One thing we must always remember ourselves when ever we have the urge to criticize is that “no human being is perfect” we are all bound to err one way or the other no matter how skilled or knowledgeable we are about life. Remembering this will help us to keep our tongue in check whenever we have the urge to criticize.
2. Show Appreciation.
As much as we all hate and dread criticism so we crave for appreciation, our craving for appreciation comes the fact we all want be regarded as important and relevant. When you show sincere appreciation for what someone done has they will automatically respond by do more of the things that brings them appreciation. Likewise when we criticize people they move away from us and whatever is it that brings them criticism.
When we praise people for what they have done the feeling that we stir in the is always pleasant, they brighten up and becomes more cheerful and whenever they see us their brain replays the cheerfulness they got the last time and warms up for thereby will to get along with us.
Appreciation and praise who never be done in, manner that will convey flattering because flattering deliver the opposite of what praise and sincere appreciation will done .flattering will make the person being flattered feel being make jest of and this is not what we want to do. Flattering is shallow and insincere and will not achieve result with any discerning person. Flattering makes the subject feel manipulated and been mislead and this will create some sort of resentment even though it may not be apparent immediately.
3. Do your best to remember names.
How you feel when you have met only briefly someone and the next time you meet again and the person clearly remember your name by addressing with your name, you have a contact with a high ranking person who may not be interested in you but on your second meeting address you by your full name. In am sure in all this circumstances you will definitely happy in that the other person has clearly put in mind. If we want to get along with others and create this feeling in them we must then remember people’s names.
Many of us remember names of our people we met, when we address people by their name we set them apart from others, we saying they are unique and they are sure that they are truly gaining your attention. Calling people by their names work wonders as it reemphasis their identity.
Many of us are used to calling and been called by nicknames and pet-names but this is not good enough as most nicknames are usually tied to a particular events, places, and some other things in our lives but the name represent the complete person from their birth to that particular moment, so when you call someone their name your go deep into the person.
These are just a few of the things that we can do get along with others, but in the process of putting it into practice we should not take it like daily but make a part of our us that as we meet people of great and low estate we treat them with some feeling of importance you will begin to get along with others and life will be much easier to live.
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